independent poet – Poetry by Rowan Evans

Author’s Note

Two hundred days ago, I decided to post a piece on my blog every single day. Not because I knew it would grow. Not because I knew it would matter. But because I needed structure. I needed discipline.

Some days were easy. Some weren’t. There were nights I questioned whether anyone was reading, whether it made a difference, whether I should stop. But that was never really the point.

The point was showing up.
The point was building something real.
The point was proving to myself that I could be consistent.

Two hundred days later, I’m still here.
Still writing. Still learning. Still becoming.

The point was always discipline.

— Rowan Evans

A notebook and pen on a desk in soft morning light with a calendar marked day 200, symbolizing writing discipline and consistency. — *Two hundred days. The point was discipline.*

The Point Was Discipline
Poetry by Rowan Evans

Two hundred days,
two hundred nights—
I chose to write
in spite of
depression spells,
and anxiety swells.

I wasn’t sure
it would matter
to me, to you,
to anyone.

But here’s the thing—
It didn’t really matter,
that was never the point.

The point was discipline—
that’s why I have
two-hundred days
of showing up.

I wrote confessions.
Almost slipped
and said the words,
1-4-3 and I Meant It.
I’ll say it again,
in just Two Words—
Mahal kita.

I wrote through
Liminal Static,
to uncover things
Etched in Memory.

I wrote poems
with ink-dipped
rose thorns,
Body/Mind,
Quietly Rearranged
in the Depths
of my Sprawling Thoughts.

If you’re interested in more poetry, you can find it here → [The Library of Ashes]

Author’s Note

This piece came from a quiet fear I don’t talk about often – not fear of failure, but the fear of success.

I’ve spent most of my life identifying with the misfits, the outcasts, the ones who feel unseen. If the dreams I’ve been working toward actually come true, I don’t want to lose that alignment. I don’t want distance to turn into detachment. I don’t want growth to become ego.

Above No One is me checking myself before I ever need to.

Because if I ever rise, I want to rise without looking down on anyone.

— Rowan Evans

A person standing on a city street at dusk, surrounded by tall buildings, symbolizing humility and staying grounded despite ambition. — *You can’t witness from above.*
*You’ve got to stand in the street.*

Above No One
Poetry by Rowan Evans

I’ve been thinking
about it a lot lately.
What would I do
If my dreams came true?

Honestly—
I don’t know.

I’d like to think
I’d stay the same.
That I wouldn’t change.

Because no matter
the successes—
I’d feel like a failure,
if I abandoned my people.
The outcasts and misfits,
the baby monsters and stray kids.

And I worry—
success might change
the way I see the world.
That I’ll see myself
on a pedestal,
looking down.

But I’m above
no one.

I worry
I’ll forget
where I started.
That perspective
will get distorted.
That history
will be reframed.

I don’t want to lose
the truth to arrogance.

What if success
creates
a different type
of disconnect?

I don’t want to become
unreachable.
To feel like I don’t belong
amongst the people
I came from.

You can’t witness from above—
you’ve got to stand
in the street.

I don’t know.
These thoughts
cross my mind sometimes.

What if growth
means change—
and change means
I’m no longer
who I used to be?

I don’t know.

Maybe—
I’m overthinking.

But overthinking
in this instance,
keeps me grounded.

Keeps me
from drowning,
under the weight
of becoming
something
I never meant to be.

Twenty-three years
and countin’—
at thirty-six,
that kind of time
makes you think.

If you’re interested in more poetry, you can find it here → [The Library of Ashes]

Poetry by Rowan Evans

Tag: independent poet

The Point Was Discipline – 200 Days of Posting Poetry Every Day

Above No One – A Poem About Success, Humility, and Staying Grounded