Tag: Philippines

  • Author’s Note

    This poem became the quiet conclusion to a trilogy I never intended to write.

    Crossing the Sea was about direction.

    Only Waiting was about the reason I needed that direction in the first place.

    This piece asks a different question:

    How do you keep moving when you haven’t arrived yet?

    For me, the answer has always been dreams.

    Not because I confuse them with reality, but because they remind me that another reality is possible.

    I’ve written about dreams for years. They rarely feel random to me. They often feel like rehearsals—small glimpses of a life my mind already believes exists somewhere beyond the horizon.

    The city in this poem isn’t a specific city.

    The moon isn’t really the moon.

    Even after spending two poems trying to strip away metaphor, I found myself sitting beside it again.

    I think that’s because hope has always spoken to me symbolically.

    When I’m awake, I know where I am.

    When I’m asleep, I remember where I’m going.

    The dream doesn’t replace reality.

    It sustains me until reality catches up.

    The final image—a dream folded into my chest like a map—is probably the clearest way I’ve ever described hope.

    Hope isn’t certainty.

    It isn’t arrival.

    It’s carrying the direction with you, even when you’re still standing at the beginning of the journey.

    And maybe that’s what this trilogy has been trying to say all along.

    Sometimes home begins as a place.

    Sometimes it becomes an ache.

    Sometimes…

    it’s simply the direction you’re already walking.

    Rowan Evans


    A lone figure sits beneath a full moon where an ocean shoreline transitions into quiet city streets, holding a folded map while reflecting on hope, dreams, and the journey toward home.
    “Sometimes home isn’t where you’re standing—it’s the direction you’re already walking.” 🌙🗺️

    Pointing Me Home (No Metaphor Left Behind)
    Poetry by Rowan Evans

    Tick tock, tick tock—
    that’s the sound of the clock.
    I listen as I wait for the escape,
    a simple trip, brought on by sleep.
    Because I only feel at home
    in my dreams.

    So as I close my eyes
    and my head hits the pillow—
    I follow the moon
    to the ocean’s edge,
    I listen to the tide—
    I follow it in stride
    until I find where it’s pulling me.

    With every step,
    I move deeper in.
    Slowly sand turns to concrete
    beneath my feet,
    as the beach transitions
    into city streets.

    Streetlights flicker
    like they’re remembering
    they used to be stars.

    The hum of the city
    folds into the sound of waves,
    each echo a reminder
    of where I started
    and where I’m going.

    I walk until the moon
    hangs between buildings
    like it’s lost too—

    like it’s looking someone to talk to.

    So I sit and conversate,
    I tell the moon all about the quiet ache—
    the feeling that I need to change
    my environment to one that aligns
    more with what I feel inside.

    And the moon sits with me,
    just listening—so I talk some more.
    Out of my heart, the words just pour.
    I spill every secret, I hold nothing back
    until I feel like I might collapse.

    The moon listens,
    patient as ever,
    its light softening
    the edges of my thoughts.

    And when I finally fall silent,
    breath trembling,
    chest heavy—

    it tilts itself
    just enough
    to remind me
    I’m not alone
    in the places I wander.

    Tick tock, tick tock.

    A return to the rhythm of the clock,
    interrupting the talk—
    the moon’s light gives way
    to the sun’s rays,
    I’m still stuck in this place—

    but I’m only waiting
    until I can cross the sea,
    Pacific and the Philippine.

    Until then,
    I carry the dream like a map,
    folded in my chest—

    pointing me home.


    Journey into the Hexverse…

    [Crossing the Sea (No Metaphor Left Behind)]
    A deeply personal poem about relocation, longing, and the realization that some truths naturally arrive through metaphor—even when we try to leave it behind.

    [Only Waiting (No Metaphor Left Behind)]
    The second poem in the No Metaphor Left Behind series, exploring the quiet ache of growing up in a place that never truly felt like home—and finally saying aloud what years of metaphor had been trying to express.

    If you’re interested in more poetry, you can find it here → [The Library of Ashes]

  • Author’s Note

    This poem began as an experiment in restraint.

    I wanted to see what would happen if I stopped relying on metaphor—the oceans, tides, moons, and distant imagery that so often shape the way I write—and instead said things as directly as I could.

    What I discovered is that I don’t really think in a “non-metaphorical” way.

    Even when I try to remove symbolism, my mind still reaches for it. The language of distance, direction, and crossing appears naturally because that is how I process emotional states: spatially, geographically, in motion.

    So the poem became something else.

    Not an escape from metaphor, but an awareness of it.

    A recognition that even when I say “I won’t use the ocean this time,” I still understand my life through movement across it.

    This piece lives in that tension between clarity and instinct—between what I am trying to say plainly, and the language my mind naturally returns to.

    And in the end, it admits something simple:

    Sometimes the clearest way to say the truth… is still through the shape of the thing you tried to leave behind.

    Rowan Evans


    A lone traveler stands on a Pacific shoreline looking toward distant islands across the ocean at sunrise.
    Some distances are measured in miles. Others are measured in becoming.

    Crossing the Sea (No Metaphor Left Behind)
    Poetry by Rowan Evans

    I am going to try
    something that terrifies me—
    that most of the time,
    would leave me paralyzed.

    I am going to try
    and say everything
    I hold inside—
    no metaphors
    to hide behind
    this time.

    I’m not where
    I want to be
    and part of me,
    thinks I’ll never be.

    I know that’s just
    fear and doubt—

    just because part of me
    thinks it, doesn’t make it true.

    Relocating
    is just taking
    longer than I wanted it to.

    But I know the direction.
    The destination is clear—
    I just got to get there.

    I got to leave here.

    This isn’t a new feeling—
    I’ve said this all before,
    buried in metaphors.

    Hidden behind symbolism.

    This is where
    I’d put the ocean
    and the tide,
    a way to describe
    the distance.

    Between where I am
    and where I want to be—
    and to get there,
    I have to cross the sea.

    Not a metaphor,
    I mean that literally—
    Pacific and the Philippine.


    Journey into the Hexverse…

    [Translating What I Feel]
    A poem about the invisible process of turning emotion into imagery, imagery into language, and language into poetry. An intimate reflection on creativity, loneliness, and twenty-three years of learning to translate what the heart feels.

    [Recognizes Home]
    A free-verse poem exploring the difference between love as dependency and love as choice. It challenges the idea that love must be need-based, instead centering the quiet strength of choosing someone while still remaining whole on your own.

    [Not Rebuilding You]
    A poem about love as an act of presence rather than rescue. Through construction imagery, Not Rebuilding You explores trust, devotion, emotional safety, and the quiet work of building a foundation strong enough for healing to grow.

    [The Language Her Soul Speaks]
    What if love isn’t about being understood, but learning to understand someone else? “The Language Her Soul Speaks” is a free verse poem about intimacy, communication, curiosity, and the desire to know another person beyond the limits of language.

    [Ocean Waves (1, 4, 3)]
    A moonlit shoreline, a rowboat full of ducks, a piggybank with no cents, and a confession hidden in plain sight. Ocean Waves (1, 4, 3) explores how humor, wordplay, and absurdity can become a side door to vulnerability when the truth feels too difficult to say directly.

    [L Words & Heart]
    A playful, self-aware poem about love, longing, loyalty, and the quiet ways another person can reshape our inner world. What begins as humor slowly reveals a heartfelt confession about affection, imagination, and the faces that linger in our dreams.

    [I’ll Be There to See Your Sunrise]
    Love has never come easily to me. This poem explores the fear, vulnerability, and quiet courage required to stay emotionally present when connection begins to matter deeply. “I’ll Be There to See Your Sunrise” is about choosing love despite the risk of heartbreak—and promising to remain long enough to witness someone fully.

    [Altar and Roses]
    A gothic free verse poem about poetic identity, recurring symbolism, devotion, and the quiet humanity beneath dramatic imagery.

    If you’re interested in more poetry, you can find it here → [The Library of Ashes]

  • Author’s Note

    This piece started as something simple—a list of music I love.

    But somewhere along the way, it stopped being about songs and became something closer to identity.

    It turned into a love letter to the sounds that shaped me.

    The music we grow up with—or stumble into—doesn’t stay in our headphones. It starts shaping how we feel, how we remember, how we move through the world. Over time, those sounds stop belonging to “other places” and start becoming part of our internal geography.

    This poem moves through four countries because that’s the path my ears—and honestly, my heart—took growing up. These artists weren’t just background noise; they were cultural touchpoints that expanded my worldview long before I ever had the chance to travel.

    I’ve never lived in the places referenced here. But I’ve visited them in the only way I knew how: through sound.

    The references in this poem aren’t meant to claim ownership of any culture, genre, or community. They’re acknowledgments—expressions of gratitude for the music that helped me understand myself, broaden my empathy, and feel connected to places far beyond my own borders.

    What surprised me while writing this was realizing that I don’t experience those influences as separate anymore. They’ve blended into something personal. Something translated. Something re‑owned in the act of listening and feeling.

    This poem is about that transformation.

    About how a heart can echo across languages and still sound like itself.

    Every name, every lyric nod, every language shift is part of the map of how I became who I am.

    This isn’t a history lesson or a ranking of influences.
    It’s simply the story of how music taught me to feel at home in more than one place.

    Rowan Evans


    Glowing world map formed from sound waves connecting Japan, Korea, China, and the Philippines with floating musical elements in a dreamlike sky.
    Where sound becomes geography, and music becomes memory.

    A Heart That Echoes in Another Language
    Poetry by Rowan Evans

    I sit in the colors of Japan,
    red and white, as heavenly6 hits—
    it’s the melody that drifts
    under paper moons.

    It’s the beauty I see
    in the filth around me,
    THE GAZETTE resounding—

    but still I say Hi Hi when we meet,
    it’s the sounds of Tokyo
    that make me move my feet—

    Ami Onuki and Yumi Yoshimura
    shaped my global empathy,
    that’s one thing I’m sure of.

    하루하루—
    I drifted,
    my mental shifted
    as I moved across
    the East Sea.

    BIGBANG made it easy.

    The Kings of K-Pop,
    guided me deeper
    into that scene.

    It was all brand new—
    it was SHINee.

    And that’s when I fell for
    Brown Eyed Girls—
    it was like magic.

    Abracadabra.

    Pause.

    Now, if you think this is
    the full story, you’re wrong.

    This is just a Highlight
    of when I was a BEAST
    for new sounds.

    Then we shift again—
    MandoPop and Canto, too,
    Chinese R&B will make you move.

    Guess you can call me,
    Kuzco—
    the way China gave me
    a brand new groove.

    With each new song,
    I found a G.E.M.—
    a sound that will
    Get Everyone Moving.

    Nine Chen hit me
    right in the chest—
    a different kind of ache.

    So when it’s time to go,
    and it’s hard to leave—
    I say “Bai Twice,”

    before I catch my
    sonic flight,
    ride the sound waves
    to a different place—

    to different streets,
    where their beats
    reverberate in different ways—

    where I land next is a place
    that feels like home—
    a sound that speaks
    in warmth and gold.

    Musika taught me
    something important—

    that a heart can echo
    in another language.

    Dionela wrapped me
    in a softness
    I didn’t know I needed.

    And G22 showed me
    that power can be
    a kind of prayer—

    a chorus you carry
    in your bones.

    Across four nations,
    I followed melodies
    like constellations—

    each song a compass,
    each rhythm a road.

    And somewhere between
    the beats and borders,
    I learned that home
    isn’t a place you find—

    it’s a sound
    you grow into.


    Journey into the Hexverse…

    [The Soil Won’t Write Me]
    Sometimes survival looks like disappearing into art long enough to find yourself again. “The Soil Won’t Write Me” is a confessional free verse poem about displacement, mental noise, rootlessness, and using writing as a way to stay afloat.

    [The Needle Doesn’t Point North]
    “The Needle Doesn’t Point North” is a deeply personal free verse poem about displacement, identity, and spending a lifetime feeling emotionally disconnected from the place you were born while being drawn toward distant shores.

    [Weather in My Chest]
    “Weather in My Chest” is a free verse poem about emotional hyperawareness, social tension, and the quiet experience of carrying internal storms into rooms that react before a singl[e word is spoken.

    [Sound as a Vessel]
    “Sound as a Vessel” is a free verse poem about music as emotional architecture, exploring how international artists and soundscapes shaped identity, creativity, memory, and poetic voice.

    [Just Knowing You Has Been Enough]
    “Just Knowing You Has Been Enough” is a deeply vulnerable free verse poem about unspoken love, emotional fear, coded confessions, and the quiet truth of caring for someone without needing perfection in return.

    [The Streets I Walk When I Sleep]
    “The Streets I Walk When I Sleep” is a deeply intimate free verse poem about recurring dreams, emotional connection, longing across distance, and the strange feeling of remembering places and moments that have never happened in waking life.

    [Memories From a Life Yet to Come]
    Some dreams feel less like fantasy and more like memory. “Memories From a Life Yet to Come” is a reflective free verse poem about longing, displacement, emotional alignment, and the strange comfort of recognizing yourself more clearly in dreams than in waking life

    [Separate Timelines]
    “Separate Timelines” is a surreal and deeply introspective free verse poem about emotional distance, time zones, vulnerability, and the fear of losing a connection that already feels meaningful before the words are ever spoken aloud.

    If you’re interested in more poetry, you can find it here → [The Library of Ashes]

  • Author’s Note

    This piece is about a feeling I’ve struggled to name for most of my life — a feeling that I have tried to explain more recently — a quiet but persistent disconnect that began when I was fourteen.

    It isn’t about hating where I’m from.
    It isn’t about romanticizing somewhere else.

    It’s about that internal shift — the moment you realize you feel unrooted in a place where everyone else seems firmly planted.

    For years, I thought I was running away.
    Now I understand I’ve been moving toward something.

    Whether that “home” is a city, a country, a person, or a version of myself I haven’t fully stepped into yet — I don’t know.

    But I know this:
    I am not lost anymore.
    I am in motion.

    Rowan Evans


    A lone figure looking toward a distant city skyline under a star-filled night sky, symbolizing longing and the search for home.
    Sometimes home isn’t where you started. Sometimes it’s where you finally breathe.

    Toward Somewhere I Can Breathe
    Poetry by Rowan Evans

    I’ve tried my whole life
    to explain it.
    This disconnect,
    I’ve felt since
    2004.

    How can I make it
    any more clear?
    I just don’t belong here.

    I’m going to try
    and try to make it
    make sense.
    I was fourteen,
    Hi Hi Puffy AmiYumi
    on the screen.

    But that’s not the important part.

    Inside—
    I could feel
    threads fray,
    and they
    already existed
    in decay.

    But I learned quickly,
    in 2007 exactly—
    there is Filth in the Beauty,
    and the reverse
    can be the same.

    That’s when
    my view of the
    world changed,
    and became
    cemented.

    Something shifted,
    vision cleared—
    and everything
    I missed before,
    just appeared.

    Where everyone
    around me,
    seemed rooted
    in the here.

    And I—
    would close my eyes,
    and wish upon
    shooting stars.
    I wanted out,
    I wanted to leave,
    go somewhere far.

    I knew it would take time,
    I needed things to align.
    But now I know
    what I’m moving toward,
    what I’m working for.

    I’m moving toward home.
    A place, where I belong.

    Maybe when I finally leave,
    I’ll touch down in the Philippines
    to walk Manila’s streets,
    and finally be able to breathe.


    If you’re interested in more poetry, you can find it here → [The Library of Ashes]

  • Across the Storm, My Heart Still Beats with the Philippines


    Calm ocean at dawn showing light after the storm.
    Hope rises again — across the storm, across the sea.

    Over the past week, my heart has carried the weight of storms.
    First, Typhoon Tino (Kalmaegi) swept through the central islands,
    and before the earth could breathe,
    Super Typhoon Uwan (Fung-wong) roared across nearly the entire country—
    winds and rains so vast, they seemed to swallow the sky.

    Even from across an ocean, I have felt it—the ache, the worry,
    the whispered prayers that travel through time zones.
    I have friends there, people I hold close to my heart,
    and through them, I have come to love not just individuals,
    but the spirit of the Filipino people:
    resilient, compassionate, endlessly giving,
    even when there is little left to give.

    As the news unfolded, I did what I could from here:
    prayed to whatever higher powers might hear me,
    lit candles, whispered the names of those I love,
    sent energy into the dark,
    and asked others to do the same.

    It is never enough, I know.
    But love—even distant love—is still a kind of offering.
    And I hope that love can reach you,
    even across oceans and storm clouds.

    If you feel moved to help, consider lending your compassion to relief efforts—
    whether through a donation, spreading awareness,
    or sending your own prayers into the night. Every act ripples outward.


    Here are organizations providing emergency relief and long-term support:

    Philippine Red Cross – Emergency aid, medical relief, and disaster response.

    GlobalGiving – Immediate supplies and funds for recovery projects.

    Caritas Manila – Coordinates aid for affected families and communities.

    Oxfam Pilipinas – Supports marginalized communities and climate resilience.

    World Vision Philippines – Offers food, shelter, and protection for children.

    Save the Children Philippines – Focused on education and child safety during disasters.

    I also encourage those outside the country to seek local, community-led donation drives and mutual aid networks within the Philippines—people helping people, neighbors helping neighbors. Their voices, their needs, must always be centered.


    A Prayer for the Islands I Love
    Poetry by Rowan Evans

    May the waters still,
    and recede.
    May roofs rise again,
    and laughter return to the doorways.
    May every whispered prayer
    become a hand reaching out.

    For every island, every home,
    every heart that still trembles—
    know that you are not alone.
    Even across oceans,
    my love remains with you.

    May my friends, and the families I carry in my heart,
    find safety, courage, and hope.
    May the warmth, pride, and spirit
    of a people I have come to love so deeply
    guide them through the night.

    The sea cannot drown
    what is built on hope.
    And the light,
    the light always returns
    to the Philippines.

    With love, solidarity, and prayers,
    Rowan Evans

  • The Introduction…

    Sound has always lived differently in me.
    Being autistic means the world sometimes reaches me at full volume —
    too much light, too much noise, too much everything.

    The static hum of a fluorescent bulb,
    the electricity whispering through the walls when everything else falls silent —
    it’s constant, it’s aggravating, and it overwhelms me more often than I’d like to admit.

    But music?
    Music has always been my calm.

    It’s the one constant that never demanded I make sense of myself.
    With every note, I could breathe again.
    Certain songs still hold the fingerprints of who I was the first time I heard them —
    I can feel the exact ache, the pulse, the quiet hope that hummed beneath my skin.
    Music has always been my way back to myself.

    Over the past twenty years, that love has stretched across oceans.
    I fell for Japan’s wistful melancholy,
    for Korea’s raw confessions,
    for China’s grace and discipline,
    and for the Philippines’ warmth and heart.
    I didn’t need to understand every word — I could feel them.
    Emotion translates without permission.

    What began as listening became belonging.
    These cultures gave me soundtracks for my healing,
    and languages that somehow spoke me fluently
    before I ever learned to translate them.

    This poem is my thank-you —
    a devotion to the music and the lands that shaped me.

    Rowan Evans


    A dreamy illustration of a woman surrounded by glowing lanterns shaped like musical notes, each representing Asian cultures, as she stands in a sea of sound waves with her eyes closed in calm reflection.
    “Music is how I pray — across oceans, across languages, across lives.”

    Polyjamourous
    Poetry by Rowan Evans

    I am polyjamourous for music,
    polyamorous for culture—
    I love across language,
    love across oceans of distance.

    Japan whispers in my bones,
    Korea hums in my veins,
    China flows through my pulse,
    the Philippines lingers in my breath.
    Each a lantern in the corridors
    of my heart,
    each echo a thread of home
    woven into who I am.

    I am polyjamourous for music,
    polyamorous for culture—
    I love across language,
    love across distance.
    I bow to the lands
    that shaped me,
    even from a thousand miles away,
    even from a thousand lives away.

    And to them, I murmur—
    ありがとう,
    감사합니다,
    谢谢,
    salamat po,
    thank you—

    Each syllable, a soft flame,
    a quiet devotion
    carried across the world,
    across time,
    across the chambers of my soul.


    Soundtrack of My Heart

    The music that shaped me, that carried me through nights of stillness and storms of thought, is more than sound—it is devotion. Here are a few threads of that tapestry, songs that held me, lifted me, and made me feel home during my 20 years of listening to music across oceans:

    The GazettE – “Filth in the Beauty”
    The soundtrack to my 17-year-old chaos—every riff, every scream etched into memory. The GazettE taught me that beauty can thrive in filth. R.I.P. Reita.
    XG – “WOKE UP”
    A reminder of why I fell in love with K-Pop—the raw energy, the pulse, the feeling of waking fully alive in music. Language doesn’t matter; what hits the soul never needs translation. XG’s fire makes me feel every beat, every pulse, alive.
    By2 – “Don’t Go Away”
    I was 19 the first time this song became part of me—each note, each line a mirror for the ache and hope of that age. By2 showed me the power of longing, of holding on and letting go at once. Even now, it hits me right in the chest, a familiar heartbeat across time and distance.
    BINI – “Pantropiko”
    Instant sunshine—bright, unstoppable, impossible not to move to. Pantropiko reminds me that joy can be loud, colorful, unapologetic. Every time it plays, it lifts me, fills the room with warmth, and makes me feel fully alive in the moment.

    Each song is a lantern, each beat a heartbeat, each melody a language of the soul. Listen, feel, and know—my polyjamorous heart beats across these lands, and perhaps yours will, too.

  • Across the Distance, My Heart Remains with the Philippines.


    A picture of the Philippines flag at half-mast.
    Philippine flag at half-mast – honoring those affected by recent disasters and standing in solidarity from afar.

    Through connections, friendships, and the lives of people who have touched mine, the Philippines has grown to mean so much to me—the people, the culture, the language. Each interaction has left a mark, each conversation a lesson, and every word of Tagalog I learn feels like a thread linking me closer to a place that has shaped my heart in ways I cannot fully explain.

    Hearing about the recent 6.9 magnitude earthquake that struck central regions, coming just days after the devastating storm, hits me hard. The grief, loss, and upheaval families and communities are enduring—it’s impossible not to feel it, even from across an ocean. The overlap of these tragedies makes it feel heavier, like the weight of two storms upon the same shoulders.

    If you feel moved to help, here are reputable organizations providing emergency relief and support:

    Philippine Red Cross – Emergency aid, medical relief, and recovery support across the country.

    GlobalGiving – Provides emergency supplies and long-term recovery assistance.

    Caritas Manila – Coordinates disaster response and long-term recovery efforts.

    Oxfam Pilipinas – Supports marginalized communities and climate resilience programs.

    World Vision Philippines – Provides food, shelter, and child protection during emergencies.

    Save the Children Philippines – Ensures children’s education, health, and protection in disaster-affected areas.

    Even from an ocean away, I feel the weight of what has happened. My thoughts, prayers, and care go out to the people affected. I hope that in the midst of grief, hands find hands, hearts hold fast, and the sun rises again over the islands I love.

    Across the Water

    I feel your grief in every wave,
    Your sorrow carried through the night.
    Hands unseen reach to the brave,
    And hearts across the sea unite.

    Even in the rubble and rain,
    Even when the world feels torn,
    Love threads through the fear and pain,
    A spark that will not be forlorn.

  • An homage to the places, people, and music that shaped me


    A mashup of Tokyo, Manila, and Seoul cityscapes with floating musical notes representing cultural and musical inspiration.
    Asia has shaped me for over twenty years—through music, language, and the people I’ve met. This is a reflection on the connections that have inspired my life and poetry.

    Some places leave marks long before we ever set foot in them. My love for Japan began when I was fourteen, watching Hi Hi Puffy AmiYumi for the first time. By fifteen, YouTube was a doorway into a world of music, culture, and imagination I had only glimpsed from afar. At sixteen, the GazettE’s Nil album arrived just after my birthday, and with it, a new intensity—a love for the artistry, the language, the heartbeat of Japanese culture—that has persisted for over twenty years.

    At eighteen, my journey with the Philippines began. I met two young girls, five years my junior, and they became like nieces to me. Watching them grow, witnessing their lives unfold, I took on a protective role, and in doing so, my admiration for the people and culture of the Philippines deepened. Around this same time, I met a girl who captivated my mind and heart. We became close quickly, drawn together by a shared intensity, yet our paths diverged. We wanted different things, and the connection, though brief, burned brightly, leaving a mark that kept my love for the Philippines alive in my heart.

    During these years, my fascination with Asia expanded. KPop introduced me to the vibrancy of Korea, its music and culture, while Chinese Pop offered another window into a world I was eager to understand, free from the narrow perspectives often presented around me. These interests were not casual—they were devotion, curiosity, and care, each note and lyric shaping the way I saw the world.

    Over time, my connections with people from the Philippines grew deeper, reigniting my love for the language, the culture, and the people who had first opened my eyes. And then I met my muse, the woman whose presence has inspired all of my love poems, whose influence brought the Philippines, its people, and its culture back to the forefront of my mind.

    Asia has been a part of my life for more than twenty years. It has shaped me in ways I struggle to explain—through music, language, friendships, and fleeting yet powerful connections. It has influenced how I see the world, how I feel, and how I write. I carry the warmth of these cultures, the lessons of these people, and the spark of inspiration they’ve left behind, wherever I go.

  • Heartfelt Solidarity: Support for Those Affected by the Recent Storm in the Philippines

    The flag of the Philippines at half mast.
    For every life lost, for every heart still beating.

    Even though I have never set foot in the Philippines, the country has always held a special place in my heart. Over the years, through friendships and personal connections, I have come to feel a deep respect and affection for its people. Asia, in general, has been a part of my life in ways I sometimes can’t fully explain, but that connection runs deep.

    Hearing about the recent storm that tragically took the lives of ten people in the Philippines hit me hard. I cannot imagine the grief, loss, and upheaval that families and communities are enduring. It is in moments like these that I feel compelled to stand in solidarity, even from afar.

    If you feel moved to help, here are a few reputable organizations providing relief and support to those affected:

    Philippine Red Cross – Emergency aid, medical relief, and recovery support across the country.

    GlobalGiving – Provides emergency supplies and long-term recovery assistance.

    Caritas Manila – Coordinates disaster response and long-term recovery efforts.

    Oxfam Pilipinas – Supports marginalized communities and climate resilience programs.

    World Vision Philippines – Provides food, shelter, and child protection during emergencies.

    Save the Children Philippines – Ensures children’s education, health, and protection in disaster-affected areas.

    Even a small act of support—whether it’s donating, spreading awareness, or keeping those affected in your thoughts—can make a difference. My heart goes out to everyone impacted, and I hope we can all hold them in compassion and solidarity.

    I send this prayer across the ocean—
    to the shorelines I’ve never touched,
    to the people I’ve always carried in my heart.
    Even in the dark,
    light belongs to you.

    May the storms relent,
    and the seas grow still.
    May hands find hands,
    and hearts hold fast.
    The sun will rise again
    over the islands I love.

    Though miles and waters divide us,
    I feel your grief like it is my own.
    Hold on, beloved Philippines—
    my heart is with you.

  • Nakauwi na ako.

    I was staying with the guy who offered me a place—a warm, open home in the Philippines. The morning was slow, soft. We just talked and laughed, getting to know each other better as the sun filtered through the window. I felt… weightless. For the first time in so long, my body didn’t ache. I didn’t need to hide inside my own skin.   
       
    Later that day, I met up with her at the mall. The woman that had inspired every single love poem I had written for the last year.   
       
    She was wearing a sundress, soft purple with white stripes. It matched her Nikes—white with hints of violet, like twilight folded into fabric. Her voice sounded like heaven, and her giggle—God, her giggle—made the whole world stop. The way she caught me looking at her, like she knew, and didn’t mind… like she liked it. The world faded every time she laughed. It was just us. No noise, no pain, no fear. Just us.   
       
    We wandered the shops. She lit up when we passed a shoe display. I noticed the way her eyes lingered, how her fingers brushed the pair she liked without touching the price tag. She didn’t need to ask. I bought them for her without hesitation. Not to impress her—but because I wanted to. Because she deserved to have things that made her smile like that.   
       
    Before the dream ended, I said something in Tagalog. I don’t remember the words, not fully. But I know what they meant:   
       
    “I’m home.”   
       
    And I was. For that brief, beautiful moment—I was whole. I wasn’t in pain. I wasn’t fighting my own thoughts. I wasn’t surviving. I was living.   
       
    I woke up with tears on my cheeks.   
       
    The sunlight in my real room was harsher—unfiltered, impatient. My knees screamed again. My back ached like it always does. The weight came rushing back, like gravity remembered me.   
       
    But even through the pain,   
    even through the disappointment of being pulled from that softness—   
    I smiled.   
       
    Because for a little while,   
    I knew what it was to live without hurting.   
    To breathe without breaking.   
    To love without fear.   
       
    And even if it was only a dream,   
    it’s mine now.   
    A secret I tuck into the folds of my ribs.   
    A memory from a place that maybe isn’t real,   
    but felt more real than anything else ever has.   
       
    And that… that’s enough to keep going.   
       
    At least for today.   
    At least for now.